Yelling From the Mountain Top: Smile for the camera

I decided to get some food while I was out and about today and since one of my errands took me to an area where the handiest thing was and Au Bon Pain so that is where I went. I asked for a steak sandwich and was directed over to a warmer to get a sandwich from there. Now I could go on for hours about how this is not quality, nor is this very good service, but hell it's a franchise what did I really expect (that's a whole different rant altogether). So I take my sandwich and proceed to eat it and I have to admit, for what it is it wasn't really bad, sure there was too much jalapeno for me to finish it let alone enjoy it after a few minutes, but it was palitable.

Now as I sat there eating my mediocre sandwich I am looking over the menu behind the counter and more specifically the pictures of the food and that got me thinking. Why are those pistures such good advertising. We all know that the food will never look that nice, after all the food in those ads is crafted by the exectutive chefs of the company and photgraphed by professionals. it's something I've never been able to get a really satisfactory answer for so it continues to bug me.

Don't make them like they used to.

I realize this is a heavily trod ground but seriously, what happened to good reliable craftsmanship. Outsourcing and cheap buying has let us not only reliant on other countries to produce our goods but on their shitty products.

Case and the source of this rant is the belt clip for my latest cellphone. About 2 weeks ago I bought a plastic belt clip and on Wednesday a very small part of the bit that holds the phone in place broke off. Now I am none to happy with this as I'm sure you can imagine. But on many levels it doesn't matter, after all since it is still under warranty I can bring it into the Verizon store and get a new one for free. I did so yesterday and when I got to work all was fine. I brushed up against something at work and it seems that my phone snagged on something, cause part of the area where the clip meets the section that the phone fits into broke off...

Okay fine, the clip still works and I am sure that I was being too rough on the damn thing, but still I got it that fucking morning. Seriously what the bleeding fuck! But what the fuck ever, the thing still works so I decide to keep wearing it and it holds up... for the rest of the night.

As I am getting out of my car at home I feel my phone snag a bit on my seat cover and when I reach for my phone I find that the belt clip has broken again... in the same motherfucking place that the FIRST ONE BROKE!

I mean obviously I can go and get another one but do I even want to at this point. I liked having a clip cause it means I don't have to leave my phone in my pocket (it feels uncomfortable during service) or out in the open (in a kitchen). but do I really want to potentially be replacing this thing every couple of weeks.

Seriously what the fuck.

Modern Parenting ... wtf?

For those of us that remember [not too long ago] that back in the early 90's there was a sense of structure for how parenting worked. Your child got out of line you scolded them or punished them based upon how bad they were. You were forced to show respect to your parents in order for them to show respect back which is a pretty simple and easy to follow concept. You want to be treated older you treat those higher up on the scale with the right amount of respect. In fact one thing this brings to mind is the cartoon show "The Boondocks" and dear old grandpa in the supermarket passing this lady and a disobedient child that's throwing a tantrum because he's not getting his way. I fecking LOVE the shit out of the beginning of that episode because he shows her how to discipline her child with a good old fashioned belt whipping. The point of the statement in that is discipline your kids. I see too many instances these days where kids have the upper hand on adults because people have gotten all bent out of shape. You can't even so much as yell at your kid in the store for fear of someone calling child services. I'm not kidding, someone really did that one day.

Nowadays you can't even spank your child for fear of someone saying that it's physical abuse towards a minor. So what to people do? They sit their kids in front of the TV or buy them what they want to shut them up faster. Apathy set in and parents don't really give a shit about how well their kid is growing up and if they've been taught manners. Most kids these days will blame anything they can on someone else even if it's because of their own shortcomings. Bullshit ecxuses for shitty behavior and even worse ... we let them get away with it. I maintain that some of the worst parenting that could be done is letting the kids rule you. Parents either don't give a shit or are too afraid of being told their childs being taken by child services because of a bullshit phone call.

Teenagers are the worst progression of human life though, supposedly all rebellious and needing their so called individuality when really all they do is goto the mall and conform to whatever the latest subculture trend is. I'm not even going to get in to that though, not my place and I'm just not in the enjoyment of fashion trends anyways. I wear what I feel comfortable in and not because it cost me $35 for a shirt [why do people PAY for things like that? Oh I got a $35 Nike shirt hurr hurr ... retards ...] I wear it because it's cheap and it fits and I DON'T look like a walking billboard. "But everyone else is wearing it!" "So? If they all jumped off a bridge to their deaths would that mean you'd do it too?"

I'd also like to point out that kids these days expect to get anything they want from anyone. Say you're walking down the sidewalk or hallway or something, they're not looking and they bump into you. Their immediate response is "Watch where you're going jackass" to which my response is a middle finger and a resounding "Sod off" as I continue to walk on and mind my own business. The point is though that where one would normally say "Sorry" or "Excuse me" it's now placing the blame directly on the person you walked into. Amusingly enough though if it's the wrong person, those kids either run or get trounced.

But really instill some respect into those bastard children and make them aware that their actions have consequenses because otherwise you're just a parental door mat for their amusement. Beat them.

The Mall Files, part one

It's clear by now that I work in a shopping mall yes? Good. Now let's be clear, my jobs at the mall generally keep me pretty isolated from the general population. Modern teenagers are borderline illiterate unless sparkly vampires are involved somewhere. So help me god I heard a teenage girl talk scornfully about another girl saying “She reads like... four books a month.” Possibly the figure was less than four. But... alas. The unwashed masses are idiots, we already knew that. So I generally don't get the full “mall experience” since I'm safely tucked away in Borders.

But, on the other hand, I work closing shifts, sometimes even on Friday nights. Now, I'm not exactly sure why, but Friday nights are the worst. Hordes of teenagers descend upon the mall. They walk the mall in packs, the smallest in groups of 4-5 ranging to groups of around 30. If only I was joking. God how I hate them. Saturdays aren't as bad... still awful... but not nearly as bad. The little bastards arrive far earlier. I've learned, on Friday the very first teens are there around 1530, around 1700 they begin to arrive in force, by 1800 no sane adults remain. I know for a fact that there are groups that do nothing but pace the mall and who have no money to buy anything. Maybe a bottle of soda, maybe.

So modern teenagers are fucking retarded. Twilight proves it, modern “music,” and oh god the clothing. Who the fuck lets a young man out of the house wearing a black latex dress liberally coated with chains? Now, I've got no problems with the fetish scene, shit I don't even have problems with a man in drag. Even in public. (I've been to Provincetown. I may be a racist but I've got nothing against people with different sexual orientation from me) HOWEVER, as with most things I'm tolerant about. I'll tolerate it or ignore it in adults. In a kid who is probably not even in Highschool? Nope. I don't give a shit about tolerance. Dress like you care about yourself and maybe one day want a job. Going out dressed in latex is great if you're heading to a club, not when you're going to the mall or out to eat or nearly anywhere else.

To my mind, if you're going to leave the house, you should dress like you want to be respected. Now, I'm almost always in business casual even if I have black jeans rather than proper slacks. Sure, that's not always necessary... but if you go out to shop or out to eat in shit that belongs in a fetish club? Barely even deserve contempt. Same with wearing your pants around your knees, same with a girl wearing what amounts to panties and calling them shorts. I won't treat you like a slut or expect you to act like one just because you dress like one... but to my mind you don't respect yourself and I really don't feel the need to show you anything other than contempt.

You know, I can get over the fact that teens are retarded, dress and act like idiots, and generally don't even deserve my time. I like to bitch about it, but I can get over it. What I can't get over is the parents. Yeah... dropping your kid off at the mall with 20 bucks for food or what the fuck ever and then driving off... that's good parenting. Sure, the fuckers are driving away all of the mall's legitimate business and don't buy a damn thing... we love to look after them.

I work there, I talk to parents and other adults on Friday nights. More than once I've made a point of asking why they would come on Friday night. Most express shock and fear at conditions inside. The majority vow never to come back again on a Friday. That's not right. No one over the age of say, 23, likes going to the mall on that night. 'least no one I've ever spoken with. That fucking sucks for everyone involved.

The real issue here, is the parents. If parents stayed with their kids they wouldn't cause problems. Wouldn't fight (although the fights are goddamn HILARIOUS! Ever seen a couple of 12 year olds have a messy break up fight? I wanted popcorn!) or make a mess out of the place. But no, that's too much like work. So they just drive up to the door at around 6, drop the kids off, and come back around 9. Fuckers. Can't stand to look after your kids? Use protection, get an abortion, just don't have the fucking kids. You obviously shouldn't have had them. Yes, your teenage bastards are annoying, I know that better than you. Act like an adult and keep an eye on them.

Here's a newsflash, I'm paid less than ten dollars an hour. I am NOT paid well enough to be a babysitter. I'm also not going to go out of my way to look after your kids. At all. You want to look around and send your (young) kids into the kids section at Borders? Go ahead, but let's be very clear. Pedophiles do hang out at malls, sometimes even work there (bastards. I'm fine with a whole lot of fetishes amongst consenting adults. That's the key, consenting adults). Yeah, we've had that, luckily the police caught him. If you don't want to look after your kids, you shouldn't have had any. And really, if your kids are younger than say, 14-15 and you're dropping them off at the mall unsupervised then I really would like to talk to Social Services about you. And that does happen.

See, I know the security guys, they're great people. Understaffed as hell, underpaid, and definitely unappreciated. One of them told me his goal is to see at least one teen leave the mall in handcuffs every single Friday night. Most weeks he succeeds. I shake his hand for this and congratulate him. It's rather amusing to see kids get escorted out and given anything from a six month ban to a lifetime ban. And if the little fucks are young enough (and sometimes they are) DSS gets involved. Those nights make me smile, I may not usually be a witness but it does please me!

I hate your kids, they get injured? I laugh. They get arrested and I cheer. They aren't my responsibility and with all the shit they do I more than hate them. Cut this shit out and act like fucking adults. Take care of your responsibilities. Oh, and to the parents to braved a FUCKING BLIZZARD to drop their kids off at the Mall (which did in fact close early because of how bad conditions were) and leave them with us. FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING FUCKERS! I want you to die, slowly, in a car fire hopefully.

Is trust really so hard.

In talking with many of my coworkers and mates over the years it occurs to me that the biggest necessity and problem in relationships is trust. Now to all you clever blokes this might not be an earth shattering revelation, but it still seems that I hear a lot about it so I feel like writing about it.

Now I am not going to sit here and ignorantly suggest that we all just try and trust each other a bit more. I am sure that most of us have been screwed over in the past by someone we trusted or maybe we were the betrayers, that's not the point of this little write up. I'm sure we all have good reason to be paranoid or suspicious of most people. That is part of the world we live in these days and in one way or another we are all to blame, but that's a different book. Here I want to put forth some thoughts of my own on the subject of trust and it's role in relationships.

One of my previous coworkers has had very bad luck with his two long term girlfriends. The first dumped him on his birthday and the second (which is almost a horror story to me) dumped him the day before his birthday by coming out of the closet to him. Now some people would have turned into horrible misogynists after such events (I know one of my old friends from back home did after only one really bad relationship). But since then he has been dating a very nice woman and they seem to be in what most people would call 'love'. Now he admits that he is a very jealous and suspicious person with regards to his current relationship and I can't say I blame him. But the defining difference with his current girlfriend is honesty. He and his girlfriend are almost perfectly honest with each other and I am sure that has helped their relationship considerable.

When you and your significant other are honest with each other (at least as any two people can be honest with each other) this has a rather wondrous effect on the relationship. Now let us assume for the purposes of this little statement that both parties involved are 'reasonable' people. That means Typhus, shut you whore mouth for 5 minutes I realize these are hypothetical conditions here. If two reasonable people are honest with each other a likely conclusion that both of them will reach at a certain point is that there is an unspoken understanding. That is, if one of the involved parties doesn't wish to talk about something, then the other party is likely to assume that there is a good reason for this. This is one of the principles of trust.

Unfortunately this thought process is often perverted by the person that is hiding something, temporary as it may be, into thinking that not telling the truth in a potentially harmful situation is for the benefit of the unknowing party. This is bullshit, plain and simple. What you don't know can and often will hurt you and likely those around you a great deal. Example being a server I work with. A series of events that I won't get into lead to a mate of her boyfriend feeling her up, and another of his mate's seeing her leave the room. Basically she was against telling him what had happened in an attempt to stop him from hurting the offending friend. Every guy that was told this basically said to just tell her boyfriend, she was not really at fault and most guys knew they would rather be told the truth by their significant other than one of their mates, or someone else.

I apologize for this getting a bit round about, but really the point is this. Once trust is established it can cover a lot of areas, but even the smallest betrayal can shatter it like a glass snowflake.